Emotional Health is the link to SPEM Health that enhances the quality of your present and future life. One is Emotionally Healthy when he or she feels Emotionally secure and relaxed in everyday life experiences and is able to maintain an open heart and open mind while interacting with others, even under stressful situations.

 

Today we are facing what seems to be insurmountable challenges that unquestionably threaten our Emotional Health. This country has always faced wars and internal conflicts ranging from the Civil War to civil rights conflicts. There are those who believe that the country is more divided now then in anytime, in history. Let us not forget that the Civil War unquestionably divided us geographically and racially as it was the bloodiest war ever on the American soil, causing the lives of 720,000 Americans. Those who were able to survive Emotionally, then and now, are those who are able to bury the hatchet of anger, hate, and revenge, and replaced with forgiveness, compassion, and a strong faith. Thomas Paine in 1776, during the crises of the Revolutionary War wrote, “These Are the Times That Try Men’s Souls.” He believed that those who were committed to human rights and who were “Emotionally Healthy” had confidence for unity.

 

“Today”, without question, is the “Time to Test our Soul”, as we are faced with much SPEM Health, Political, and Social unrest. It is time to self-reflect and reassure that our self-esteem is firmly in place with our Emotional Health to the extent that we can face these challenges with confidence. We seldom treat our self-esteem with the same treatment that we give to our teeth. When we lose our self-esteem we are more likely to be vulnerable to failure, rejection, and states of self-criticism. Persons who are Emotionally Healthy are able to recover after a loss or failure in a relationship, at work, or academically. I have seen medical students suffer an Emotional collapse after receiving a failing grade that severely impaired their confidence and self-esteem that carried over into other areas. Why is it that other students who experienced a disappointing grade were able to “recover” and did not suffer attacks that would affect their overall performance? What is the difference? Those who had sound Emotional Health recognized what they had to do and had the Emotional strength and self-esteem that gave them the confidence to overcome the bad experience. Emotional Health functions as one component of a “Health Team” that includes the other SPEM elements; namely the Spiritual, the Physical, and the Mental. The research of Dr. David McClelland of Harvard University, clearly demonstrated that successful individuals demonstrate the following qualities:

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• They are more likely to have a mental image of success.

• They are more likely to set goals that are realistic and reasonable.

• They are more likely to “feel” Emotionally comfortable with their goals.

• They develop a solid support group.

• They rely heavily on feedback. They are Emotionally secure to accept constructive feedback.

• They focus on the positive aspects, both within self and others.

 

There are important elements to sound Emotional Health

They are as follows:

 

• Develop healthy dietary habits. “You are what you eat.”

• Eliminate toxic thoughts and persons.

• Set realistic life goals.        

• Keep a strong support system      

• Maintain the Asian “Yin Yang balance of life.

• Maintain a passion that makes you happy.

• Practice the Serenity Principle: Accept what you can do and change; and what you cannot change. 
  The Serenity Prayer is an important prayer to maintain Emotional Health;
  namely give me the knowledge to change and accept those things that can be changed
  and the wisdom to recognize the difference concerning what I cannot change.

 

I attended a conference in, 1985 where a researcher presented his study on time use by professionals in Mental Health facilities. I was shocked to learn that the majority of time is spent on things that they had little success in outcomes. Dr. Peter Houts and I conducted a similar study at Penn State University. We conducted the study at several of the State Hospitals and our results were staggering. Picture a bell shaped curve. There were three separate groups. On the left corner of the curve were patients who no mater the time given to those patients or type of interventions, they stayed the same or got worse. On the right hand corner there was a group of patients, regardless of the intervention or time provided to them, they got better. On the center of the curve there were patients who had high probability for improvement. This was a study conducted to assess the amount of time individuals spend on things they cannot change. In the left side of the curve, this group represented two to seventy percent. The group on the right side represented approximately two to seventy percent. The center group represented approximately seventy-five percent. The staff we learned was spending about 74.3 percent of their time with patients who couldn’t or wouldn’t change. The unfortunate fact here is, if staff spent five percent of their time with the group that couldn't or wouldn't change, instead of 74.3 percent, it wouldn’t make a difference. Emotional healthy persons are able to recognize their limitations, be it as a parent, teacher, or therapist.

 

 Most unhappy individuals demonstrate the following:

 

• They expect that what is unrealistic or unreasonable of others.

• They spend an enormous amount of time seeking approval from others.

• They are least likely to recognize their shortcomings.

• They are quick to recognize the faults of others.

• They exhibit hypocrisy. Their behavior is not consistent with their religious claims.

• They seldom smile.

 

 

Emotionally unhappy persons spend an enormous amount of time concentrating on things or persons that they are not likely to change. Emotionally healthy individuals are happier, feel Emotionally attached to others, and appreciate the gifts of true friendships and love from family members. A healthy SPEM Foundation provides a valuable resource, not only for individuals, but for a family to strengthen their Spiritual, Physical, Emotional and Mental health. It begins with one’s self. It is important to comply with the airline commercial; “Place the oxygen mask on yourself first… so you can take care of others.” You cannot take care of others if you are not Spiritually, Physically, Emotional, and Mentally healthy.  You can begin by meditating quietly in search of where you are within yourself. You and only you can determine your present and future health and happiness. Set your sails for a healthy future! It is not the wind but the set of the sails that determine your life course.

 

In summary, again please note, persons who are Emotionally healthy are able to make productive and healthy decisions that have profound consequences for self and others. A good illustration of this is the story of two well-known persons, both of whom grew up in families where there was severe pathology, poverty, and a lack of love. They both sought attention and received recognition playing leading roles in high school plays. That recognition motivated them to seek greater acknowledgment, and through their separate paths they became celebrated figures known throughout the world. One however, because of his unhealthy Emotional health and severe pathology, became famous because of his slaughter of seven million persons. That was Adolph Hitler. The second individual, in spite of his tragic past, was able to acquire healthy Emotional Health, which he was able to do through use of music and comedy. His affect on individuals is legandary. One of his songs, "Smile", gave millions of individuals hope and faith for a brighter tomorrow. That unique person is Charlie Chaplin!

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In Good SPEM health. . . always!

 

Robert Scott, Ph D